Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Life Post: What Is Going On?

This week has just been crazy. I didn't think it could even be this way after how last week turned out, but I was proven wrong. I've been having those days where it feels like I'm running around everywhere and doing everything yet there's not enough time in the day.

I had two tests today, and I don't feel like either of them went all that well. I studied and studied for both of them, but I just wasn't taking in any of the information for some reason. I didn't seem to be the only one though. Everyone else in each class was going on about how they didn't feel prepared. And I mean in a way that was much more than usual with tests. I don't think I'm the only one experiencing some type of craziness this week.

I have to keep reminding myself that this weekend is Easter weekend, which means no class on Friday and going home for a few days. I'm not packed or anything, and it probably won't happen until right before I leave. Five minutes from now I'll forget all over again that I'm even going home. My thoughts are just so focused on other things that it slips my mind.

Due to Easter though, I think the rest of this week may slow down a bit, and I'm hoping to use Easter weekend to get ahead with everything I need to do before the pure madness of the final month of the semester sets in. I'm not confident that will actually happen considering I'll be at home with a million more distractions than at school, but I at least plan to try. Whatever I can accomplish will be helpful later.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Life Post: I Wrote About Zayn

Obviously not all that much has happened since I last wrote a life post this afternoon. My Sunday finished up quite nicely. I feel like I got a jump start on my homework for the week but also got to relax before the week starts.

What I'm writing this for, though, is that I finally went and wrote an entire post about Zayn leaving One Direction. I just did it over on my writing blog. I feel like I still have more to say, so I want to write up something more later on. This was more focused on my feelings, which it's easier talking about now, but I feel like I need more time to mull over everything before I entirely understand what even happened. I want to write about that later once I've had more time to think it all through.

That's all I really have to say. I'm hoping to get to bed soon so I can start my week off well rested. We'll see if that even happens though. I want to get some more reading done first, and I may get caught up in other things. It's been known to happen from time to time.

Life Post: A Needed Calm Period

My weekend has been the calm weekend that I definitely needed after last week. I think my mourning period for Zayn is coming to a close. Not that I'm not still sad, but it's not as all encompassing as it was before. I've come to better terms with it all now. I think I'm reaching the point where I could probably write about my feelings in more detail, but I'm still waiting just because I want to let my thoughts churn around for a bit longer now that it's not so immediate.

Saturday though wasn't all that relaxing. I had to get about 200 files converted, and it took me from the time I woke up in the morning to eight at night to finish that up. It wouldn't have taken so long except the number of files kept causing the program to freeze on me. It crashed a few times too, but I was eventually able to get everything sorted out. I'm just glad I'm done with all that. Today has been so relaxing in comparison.

Here's hoping that this week will be a calmer one. I don't think that anything can happen that will compare to Zayn leaving One Direction, so we should be good. In positive news though, Miss A's newest music video was released today. I may do a post where I talk about my feelings on it too. I'm not sure if it would be worth it or not. We'll see. I'll have to think about how much I actually have to say.

Friday, March 27, 2015

Book Review: A Student's Guide to Liberal Learning by James V. Schall

ISBN: 1882926536
Published: June 1st, 2000
Publisher: Intercollegiate Studies Institute
Read March 25th, 2015
Synopsis from Goodreads:
A Student's Guide to Liberal Learning is an inviting conversation with a learned scholar about the content of an authentic liberal arts education. It surveys ideas and books central to the tradition of humanistic education that has fundamentally shaped our country and our civilization. This accessible volume argues for an order and integration of knowledge so that meaning might be restored to the haphazard approach to study currently dominating higher education. Freshly conveying the excitement of learning from the acknowledged masters of intellectual life, this guide is also an excellent blueprint for building one's own library of books that matter.


This is a short book that is supposed to help students make the most of their liberal arts education. I honestly didn't get anything from this book. To be fair, I'm in my third year of college, so maybe it would be different if I were a freshmen. But I didn't pull anything new out of this book at all.

I also think it's important to point out that this book is written in a very religious point-of-view. I'm not saying that's either good or bad. It's just that that isn't really indicated until you're actually reading the book itself, and since that will put some people off the book, I felt like it was important to mention.

Overall, I'm just not sure I would recommend this book the anyone. There's nothing wrong with it, but I didn't gain anything from it either. And I'm not sure I know anyone who would gain something from it.

Book Review: Crossed by Ally Condie

ISBN: 0142421715
Published: November 1st, 2011
Publisher: Dutton Children's
Read from February 22nd to March 24th, 2015
Synopsis from Goodreads:
The long-awaited second book in the dystopian Matched trilogy.
In search of a future that may not exist and faced with the decision of who to share it with, Cassia journeys to the Outer Provinces in pursuit of Ky - taken by the Society to his certain death - only to find that he has escaped, leaving a series of clues in his wake. Cassia's quest leads her to question much of what she holds dear, even as she finds glimmers of a different life across the border. But as Cassia nears resolve and certainty about her future with Ky, an invitation for rebellion, an unexpected betrayal, and a surprise visit from Xander - who may hold the key to the uprising and, still, to Cassia's heart - change the game once again. Nothing is as expected on the edge of Society, where crosses and double crosses make the path more twisted than ever. 


This is a review for the second book in the Matched trilogy. I reviewed the first book Matched last year.

I wasn't sure what to expect from Crossed going into it because I had such mixed feelings towards Matched. I had been extremely excited about the concept of that book, but while certain parts of it were fun for me, there were a lot of aspects of the book I didn't like as well. And I was worried this one would get worse instead of better.

Turns out that it kind of got worse. Not significantly worse, but still worse. I didn't like it as much, and since I was pretty much in the exact middle with Matched (three of five stars) that's not that good.

In my review for Matched, I mentioned that Cassia and Ky's relationship was one of the worst part for me because I didn't find it believable. Those exact issues became even bigger to me in this book. I think the author was trying to kind of address some of the things I was thinking back then, but I'm not sure I found it all that convincing. So I still don't believe their relationship all that much, and even if I did, it seems even more bland after this book and isn't that interesting.

Speaking of blandness, the first half of this book was so slow. Part of that could possibly be contributed to how slow I read it (because of school, not the book), but I definitely think the book was a large part of it. Not much is happening. I don't typically feel that whole middle book of a trilogy thing that people talk about, but I felt it with this one.

I don't think I have much else to say, and that's at least partially because I don't feel all that much even happened in this book. I do plan to finish the trilogy at some point, but it probably won't be soon. I'm not as excited to finish it up as a usually would be after a second book. I don't really care enough about the characters or the story to rush for it. Which is really a shame because I really was excited about the idea of this series before I read the first one.

Life Post: Some More (Brief) Thoughts About Zayn Leaving One Direction

Day three of One Direction without Zayn Malik continues... Okay. Less melodrama. In all honesty, I'm feeling much better than yesterday. Whatever that means. It's kind of simmered out to a sense of "eh" about it all where I'm not showing any outward signs of being upset but I'm not all that happy about things either.

I'm very aware that for a lot of people caring at all is laughable. But I decided a long time ago that I wasn't going to care if people judged me for having legitimate emotional reactions to things. Caring about things is more or less the point of life, and if that means getting emotional about certain things that seem ridiculous to other others, so be it. I'm getting a little soap box-y here, but I've seen a lot of One Direction fans getting mocked for being upset about this, and it drives me crazy. Let's be honest, there is very little difference between how sports fans and boyband fans and any other type of fans. Certain groups are just judged more.

Anyway, in news that isn't about One Direction. Well, okay, I don't have much news that doesn't pertain to One Direction. I just posted last night, so it's not like there's been much time for anything to happen. I did present in one of my classes today. I think it went well. But other than sitting through one other class today, nothing has happened since my last post.

Despite my feelings over Zayn having evened out, it's still the only thing I've really thought about besides school work, so I'm going to end this before I start rambling on.

All I'm going to end with is mentioning briefly that Zayn's interview with The Sun was released last night (for America, early morning for England), and I have a lot of thoughts on it. The entire fandom has a lot of thoughts on it. But I'm still working on sorting them out into something coherent, which is why I'm avoiding talking about it right now. (I did tweet a few initial reactions if you're curious.) I still want to write something more in depth about my thoughts, but I think that interview is going to make it take more time. I want to have a good idea of what I think before I get to writing it. What I can say is this is proving to be quite a complicated situation to make sense of.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Life Post: So, Zayn Left One Direction...

At the risk of sounding melodramatic, my last two days haven't been all that great. My week was going pretty great until I found out that Zayn had left One Direction, and now I've spent all of my time since trying to distract myself which hasn't really worked.

I spent hours with my sister earlier because she wanted to distract herself too, and all we ended up doing for hours was talk about Zayn leaving One Direction. I'm pretty sure we didn't have even one other topic of conversation.

I don't want to write about it at length (yet) because it's one of those things that's still too fresh, and I'll probably dissolve into a crying mess if I try. I do want to write something at length about it eventually.

That's defined my past two days though, and it's put me in a terrible mood that I'm struggling to get out of, so I really have nothing else to say right now. I'm just really upset if I'm being honest, and I hope I start feeling better about things soon. I honestly have no idea how long it will take before I'm over it.

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Life Post: Reading Thoughts Recently

Remember how I mentioned a week or two back that I was going to try and read more by doing nothing except read when I wasn't writing or studying? Well, I've been doing that. For more than a week now I have honestly done nothing except read when I wasn't writing or doing schoolwork, and last night I finished a book. The first book I'd managed to finish since starting that.

So, that plan has kind of been a fail so far, but since I'd have read even less without putting in this much effort, I guess it's a good thing. I guess that also shows how little time I do anything other than write or work on school work. Just one more month until summer break, and then I plan on reading as much as I absolutely can.

I'm so behind on my reading challenge right now that it's embarrassing. I think I'm like eight books behind at the moment or something like that. I can't stand to look at it. I don't think I've ever been this far behind since I started doing reading challenges, and while my challenge is higher this year, it's not high enough to account for that.

Having a day where I could sit down and do absolutely nothing except read sounds fantastic right now. Too bad it won't happen in the foreseeable future.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Life Post: Something Strange in the Air

Something strange seems to be happening this week. I already had two classes canceled for this week before the week started because the professor is away from a conference. Then, yesterday I had a professor who had to go to the doctor (everything turned out fine), so that class was also canceled. Now another one of my professors that I have tomorrow has already emailed saying that she's sick, and although she hopes to be filling better tomorrow, she will let us know tomorrow if she can't make it to class.

What's in the air this week? I mean, they all have different things going on, but is the change in the weather doing something crazy with everyone's immune systems? I feel like there has to be some larger cause here. Fingers crossed that I don't wind up sick.

I've finished writing two different drafts in the past couple of days, so I'm feeling extremely good about that. One is a fanfiction and one is part of The Society. I'm hoping to have the fanfiction up extremely soon. (But, if you read my fanfiction, you know it's been ages since I posted a new chapter of Move On and Recover. I'm really sorry about that. There's been a lot going on, but I promise that is coming soon.)

So, now I'm wondering if I'll even have classes tomorrow with everything going on. We'll see I suppose. Class registration does open up for my class at midnight tonight, so I also have my fingers crossed that that goes well. (It will. I'm not really worried about any of the classes being filled up or anything like that.) It's been infinitely smoother than last semester, so I'm thankful for that.

Monday, March 23, 2015

Life Post: It's Finally Under Control

Last week the amount of work I had reached an all-time high, and I honestly thought I might lose my mind for a while. I hardly slept last week, and it was just not good at all. I had to figure out how I could do something about it, but I was at a complete loss for what that would be. I couldn't lessen the amount of work. (Well, theoretically, I could, but that would have involved sacrificing writing or something like that, which I wasn't going to do.)

But I think I actually figured it out. Today's been the least stressful day I've had in quite a while, and it's looking like the rest of this week is going to be the same way. I'm so thankful because I've needed this for the majority of the semester.

Still, most of what I'm doing is school stuff or writing, so there's not all that much to comment on. While I've gotten the workload to be manageable, it's all still there and has to be done.

I wrote a letter to Little Mix over on my writing blog and also posted a short little thing about my writing goals. Over on Youtube, I posted one of the most random videos ever for no real reason. I'm really hoping that I'll have more time to film and edit videos in the future, so hopefully I'll do something more soon. We'll see.

Saturday, March 21, 2015


I love the idea of mini-series. They're longer than movies and provide you with more to watch, but there not quite as much of a commitment as a television show. (And I have far too long of a list of shows to watch that will take me forever to get through.) They're a nice in between of the two.

However, I never watch mini-series. That's mostly because they're not as popular as television and movies. I tend of watch things based on recommendations I hear, and I don't really hear about any mini-series all that often. The list of shows and movies that I need to get around to watching is massive whereas I don't even have a mini-series list.

I'm pretty sure I've even mentioned this before at some point, but I'm bringing it up again. I'd really like to watch more mini-series. As of right now, I know I want to watch the Pride and Prejudice adaption eventually. (I've only ever seen the movie.) But that's all I've got.

So, does anyone have any recommendations for any mini-series that I should make sure to watch?

Reign Review: Season 2 Episode 17: "Tempting Fate"

A lot of things happened in this episode, and I think some of my thoughts on what might possibly happen have changed a little. I'm not sure. Maybe thinking them through for this post will help me sort things out.

I'm going to start talking with the two biggest things for me which is that Bash and Francis are both in "will they or won't they" states with death right now. I was pretty shocked when Bash got stabbed so badly. I hadn't been expecting something like that.

I don't think he'll die. That woman laid hands on him obviously, and based on past evidence in the show, I think it'll work. I also think that's what's wrong with Francis. I'm pretty confident that him being hurt is the consequence of Bash being healed. So, I think Bash will heal. It's Francis that I'm having trouble deciding on.

Now, real history is the main problem for this, and it shouldn't be. Reign hasn't been all that historically accurate at all, so what actually happened to any of the historical people it portrays shouldn't really factor into it I don't think. But, none of that changes the fact that I know the real history, and now I'm wracking my brain trying to decide what they'll do with this. Will he live or will he die? Just last episode I would have said he'd definitely survive, but now I'm questioning that.

An even bigger question for me is, if Francis dies, what happens between Mary and Conde? As far as I can guess, they'd probably stay together, and we all know that I hate Conde, so I wouldn't be happy about that. Even if Francis was out of the situation (i.e. dead), I still wouldn't want Mary with Conde. I would probably want her with just about anyone but Conde. I don't know what it is about Conde that makes me dislike him so strongly, but it's there.

There was so much feminism in this episode, guys, and while it seemed a bit too blatant and on the cheesy side, I can't help but love it. Would Bash really be up for giving speeches on women's rights to random domestic abusers in the fourteenth century? I really doubt it. That type of thing would have been much to accepted as just life back then. But that didn't mean I didn't enjoy hearing him say it anyway.

Honestly, all the guys on this show have a way more progressive view on women than the vast majority of men in the time period would have actually had. Considering the show's not all that historically accurate, I'm not going to argue about something positive like that though. After all, it would be much harder to like the male characters if they all treated the female characters as inferior all of the time. And I like when Reign explores how women were treated during the time period because I think it's good about keeping that in mind even if the main character's views aren't all that reflective of the actual time period.

I love Mary's progress in the episode. That was great to see, and I loved her speech about realizing she still had the same strength she had before. That speech and Catherine's speech to Narcisse about Mary were my favorite parts of the episode. I love love love the relationships between Catherine and Mary, and I'm pretty certain that's the first time she's admitted to caring about Mary out loud (even though we all knew of course). That made me so happy. I'm just seriously so in love with their relationship.

Last week I said that I thought Kenna and Bash would for sure be okay. Now I'm wondering what's going to happen between Bash and that one healing woman. I think there's either going to be a love triangle or Kenna and Bash will both move on. However, I can't help but think that they will be happy together again at some point. There's something about all of the marriages falling apart at once that seems off to me, and if Francis and Mary are really over, I think it makes better since for Kenna and Bash to work things out. It creates more variety in the story.

The only other thing to mention is Leith and Greer. (I feel like I always stick them at the end of the reviews because their storylines always feel sort of detached from everything else. I love their storylines though. They're usually great.) They're as adorable as always. I love them so much, and Leith is just so determined that he's going to get her an annulment even though everyone else is telling him no. Leith is just such an amazing character.

I think the cardinal is going to ask Leith to tell him things that will constitute as betrayal (both politically and as a friend) of France/Francis, and I feel like that will be a huge struggle for Leith. He clearly cares so much about Greer, but he's also such a loyal person, including to Francis if not France. This has the potential to be a really interesting storyline to me considering Leith's character. Plus, I obviously love anything involving Leith and Greer. I'm looking forward to seeing what happens with that.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Life Post: Further and Further Behind

I have accomplished basically nothing today except the things that I should have done yesterday. That's not good at all, but I'm thankful that it's at least the weekend, which gives me some extra time to try and catch up after being behind all weekend.

I'd probably already be at least mostly caught up except my mom was here in Indianapolis for a few hours earlier. We went to two different bookstores, and it took a shockingly long time because I couldn't find what I needed anywhere. It was nice seeing my mom, of course, but now I have such a long list of things to do even though it's night time that I just can't even bear to look at the to do list anymore.

My weekend has officially been filled with homework. Lots and lots of homework. And some writing. And hopefully some reading. We'll see what happens.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Life Post: Behind

I started off today behind. I had about half of the things I was supposed to do yesterday that I still needed to do, so I was determined to focus on absolutely nothing other than that. I've actually been pretty productive today. It's just that my to do list was (and still is) so long that you couldn't tell by looking at what's left on it.

Maybe I'd have a little more done if the stuff with One Direction hadn't happened today, but I haven't even let myself react to that all that much. I just can't spare the time to focus on it.

Tomorrow being Friday is basically the only thing keeping me sane right now. I've hardly slept all week, and I'm so out of it that it's hard to even string words together that make sense. I know that's extremely bad, but I seriously can't help it. Even with the amount of sleep I've had I don't have time to do everything. It's insane. And this weekend is probably going to largely consist of me trying to catch up on everything I'm behind on.

I'm keeping this as short as I can because of that. I posted a vlog yesterday that was filmed on Sunday when I drove up to Indianapolis for the first time by myself. It was supposed to be up on Monday, but since I'm behind, it was late Tuesday. Now, I'm off to go work some more.

Reliving Embarrassing Moments

You know those times where an embarrassing moment comes back to you out of nowhere and for a moment you're overwhelmed by the same level of embarrassment that you felt when it happened? Because it happens to me all the time. I'll just have a moment where I have to stop and cringe at my past self.

I know it's mostly unavoidable, but I'm trying to get over it. I can't change the past after all. There's nothing present me can do about something that happened to past me, and with many of them, its' not even my actions that resulted in the embarrassing action. Obviously, I would rather live without reliving any of it at all.

That will never happen though. I'll keep reliving embarrassing moments for as long as I live. At least, I suspect I will. Is there really any way to avoid it?

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Life Post: So Much

I was supposed to write this yesterday, but I didn't get to half of what I had planned to do yesterday. I'm lucky I just barely got homework done. Now I don't know what I had planned to write, and I only have a few minutes until I have to go out the door to go to my practicum.

Things are just crazy. Possibly crazy than what I was saying in my last life post. I've mentioned before that I have to do lists every day. It's the only way to keep track of the stuff I need to get done. Well, I have managed to get about half of that to do list done about every single day so far this week, and I only add on just as much to it every day. Luckily, I manage to get the things that absolutely have to be done done, but it feels like it's just barely most of the time.

I really, really hope that things aren't quite on this level for the rest of the semester. I'd probably lose my mind. Luckily, the school where I have my practicum has their spring break after this week, so that's a bit of a break from one thing. I shouldn't be saying that the week after my own spring break, but it honestly doesn't feel like I got a break at all.

In happy, less stressful news, Miss A's new single comes out later this month. The teaser images for the video look awesome, and I'm really excited about it.

Now, I have to leave in just a few minutes, so I need to wrap this up. Fingers crossed I can actually finish my to do list today.

I almost forgot really quickly to mention that I posted another character interview over on my writing blog a couple of days ago.

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Out of the Loop

The amount of work I've had lately means I've spent very little time on Twitter or Tumblr lately. Today that turns out to be a good thing because there is some massive drama going on in both the One Direction and Little Mix fandoms (both of which I happen to be a part of), and I have absolutely no time to have anything to do with it.

Basic rundown of what I know from the ten seconds or so I've been able to spare to the situation: Zayn was photographed with some girl. Some girl who was not Perrie, his fiancee.

Cue massive freak outs.

In a different situation I'd be on Twitter and Tumblr sharing opinions on the situation and actually curious about what it is that's going on. Now though, I can't spare it more than a passing thought. The only reason this is happening is because I promised myself I'd blog today, had no idea what to write about, and had just looked at this.

Other people worry about getting so busy that they no longer have a social life. I'm becoming disconnected from my fandoms.

Seriously. I feel so out of the loop lately, and the worst part is I dont' see it getting better until after finals in May. Then I'm going to have to massively catch up on what's been happening. It may take all of summer break.

Monday, March 16, 2015

Life Post: Crazy, Crazy, Crazy

Today has been a massively long day. I'm writing this so close to midnight that it might very well be Tuesday here by the time I hit "publish."

I wanted to write today for similar reasons to wanting to write yesterday. (Well, kind of, it has very little to do with driving, but I wanted to acknowledge today anyway.)

I went to the school that I'm having my practicum at today for the second time. This was the first time I was actually in the class since last time was just a meeting. I'm proud to say that I didn't get lost going there this time, but that did mean I was there insanely early since I had left extra early in case I did get lost.

Everything went well. I'm not going to go into detail for the same reason I mentioned the last time I talked about this. I was really nervous about it, which is probably part of the reason I hardly slept last night. I got less than four hours. I tossed and turned forever. I don't think it was just nerves. In fact, I don't think I was actually that nervous for the observation. I was just full of stress and had driven all day and knew I had to wake up early the next day after it had been break and knew I had tons and tons of stuff to do the next day (which I have not finished) and you get the idea. Plus, my bed here at school is as hard as a rock and you can feel every spring. I think going back to that after my much more comfortable bed at home was at least partially responsible.

I got so frustrated at one point though that I nearly started crying in bed because I was so desperate to fall asleep. Yeah... It was bad. But I'm hoping that after that I'll sleep much better tonight. Fingers crossed. I get to sleep in a bit later at any rate.

So, yeah. Things are as crazy as always. In fact, I think my school workload magically doubled, and it's only the first day after break.

The end of this semester can not come fast enough.

Oh, and the last thing since it's driving me crazy. My laptop has started making weird noises. It's like the static-y sound you get from microphones sometimes. I have no idea what it is, and it's kind of freaking me out...

Reflecting on the Past

I'm feeling pretty sentimental today. Even though I really don't know how I've even had the time to feel sentimental considering how busy I am. I don't have time to stop and think about anything that isn't what I'm dong at the moment, but when I have been the past couple of days, my thoughts keep wandering to the past.

I get like that sometimes. For a week or so, I'll be stuck in the past. It's not an "I wish I could go back" sort of thing. It's just a sort of state I get in where I keep reflecting on stuff that happened before.

Sometimes it's a little bad since I start reflecting on bad stuff, but more often than not it's fond stuff or, at the very least, neutral.

I think it's good for me actually. Sure, you shouldn't live in the past, but I think it's a good idea to reflect on stuff that happened sometimes. One of my favorite quotes is "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." - George Santayana, and I think this is one of the ways that I try to live by that quote.

So, that's the kind of state I've been in and probably will be in for a little bit longer. I don't know what sets these little periods off, but I don't think they're a bad thing. They're just helping me learn from the past.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Life Post: I Drove for Hours Today. Wow.

It's much later than I usually blog, but I really wanted to write something really brief about the day I had today. There's not really much to write down, so this won't be long. (Plus, I'm exhausted and hate the idea of writing something really long.)

Anyway, today I drove all the way back to school completely by myself. That's a huge accomplishment for me. If you haven't picked this up from past posts, I didn't get my license until this January (at twenty-one) even though I took driver's ed back when I was fifteen. I've had so much anxiety and panic attacks surrounding driving that for a while I wasn't even trying to get my license, but as soon as I started college in Indy, I knew I'd have to at some point. It still took years.

So the fact that I drove for more than three hours completely by myself today and the biggest screw up I had was not figuring out how to work the gas pump the first time I tried, is a huge deal. I honestly didn't think I'd ever be able to do that.

You'd think I'd be riding some sort of high right now, but I'm honestly not. I'm exhausted, and I still absolutely hate driving. It may not make me as anxious as it has in the past, but it's still significantly more stressful for me than it is for most people. I feel like sleeping for years now, and the fact that I have to get up earlier than usual tomorrow because of my practicum is only making me feel more stressed. I'd probably feel a bit like this just because of classes starting back, but this is my first real day at the practicum (I had a meeting with the teacher, but it was just a meeting.), so I'm, of course, way more anxious about it than I should be.

I'm like a giant ball of nerves right now, and I could avoid it while driving because I was focused on driving, but since getting to school, it's been driving me insane. I'm definitely not helping myself by writing about it because it's getting worse as I type. Case in point: this is already way longer than I had planned because now I can't stop.

I know tomorrow will go just fine. I have a good idea what to expect after the meeting. I know everything will be fine. But there's still a part of my brain that refuses to believe that, and it's driving me insane. It's only exacerbated by all the driving I did today and just the thought that classes and work and all of that starts again tomorrow too. My head is not a fun place to be right now.

Come tomorrow at this time I should be fine though. That's what I keep trying to remind myself. It's my best attempt at trying not to kill my future self due to a heart attack. It's a real thing that worries me sometimes.

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Animation Isn't Just for Kids

I love animated movies. I love Disney movies and Pixar movies and Dreamworks movies and all sorts of other animated movies. I don't claim to be an expert. I haven't watched all the animated movies out there. I'm notoriously bad when it comes to not having seen all sorts of movies that everyone else has. (They're all on my "to watch" list. I swear! Well, okay, most of them are. Some, I'll admit, I'm just not interested in.)

The idea that anything animated is meant for kids isn't quite as strong as it was in the past I think. The biggest market for animated movies (and TV shows) is still kids obviously, but I don't think adults enjoying them has quite the same stigma as in the past. I think that's an incredibly good thing.

I've always been perplexed by the idea of of only kids being able to enjoy something just because it's animated. Yes, animation has been used for certain types of movies and shows, but you can do anything with animation that you can with live action. Besides, something being "for kids" doesn't inherently mean it can't be a good movie, TV show, book, etc. for adults too. The truly good stuff holds up no matter what your age.

So I'm quite happy to say that I like watching animated movies and TV shows. Some of my absolute favorite movies and TV shows are animated, and that's not changing as I get older. Because they're quality no matter how old you are. I think the world's starting to get that too.

Life Post: The Final Days of Spring Break

Technically tomorrow is my last day of spring break, but since I'll be driving back to school tomorrow, I consider today my actual last day. That means I'm trying to get as much done as possible today. So far it's going pretty good. I'm still holding out hope that I'll finish the draft of that fanfiction today. It's looking good so far.

You know what I've forgotten to do in the last couple of these? Mention what I've been doing elsewhere on the Internet. I haven't done it for four or five life posts now! Apparently I got caught up in spring break or something. I don't know. It completely slipped my mind.

I've posted three times on my writing blog since I last mentioned it though. I wrote a letter to Hermione Granger. I talked about the idea of there being a recipe for writing. And a couple of days ago I wrote about what the kid's show Max and Ruby managed to teach me about writing.

Over on Youtube, I've posted three life vlogs since I last mentioned anything, although I haven't made any other videos. (I need to.)

Anyway, it's back to all the last minute things I need to do now. Most notably that's getting this draft finished. I think I'm packed aside from things I still need, so there's no worries about that at the moment. Just writing and some homework I still have left basically.

Friday, March 13, 2015

Life Post: Lots of Writing, Not So Much Reading

I've reached the point where I've realized spring break is almost over and I'm in shock because I don't know how that's possible despite this happening every single time. In good news, I've more or less gotten as much writing done as I wanted to. I did want to finish up this draft, which hasn't happened yet, but I have high hopes that I could accomplish that tomorrow. (Maybe even tonight since I still have some more work to do, but that's less likely.)

In not as great news, I have gotten essentially no reading done during break. I'm still behind on my 2015 reading challenge. In fact, I'm even further behind than before break. I haven't even finished one book so far. I'm still reading the same two books I was at the beginning of break, and I've hardly made any progress in either of them.

I have made an important decision about reading though that should help rectify that situation. I'll start talking more about it next week. Basically, I'm having my own read-a-thon of sorts except it'll be quite a bit longer than those usually last I think, and it's going to work a bit differently than usual since I have no time. I mean, time is the entire problem. As of right now, I plan on it being three weeks, and the basic idea is I can do nothing except read when I'm not doing school work or writing. I'm not sure if I'm going to make an exception for things like Reign or if I'll hold off on that until after the three weeks too. I probably won't decide on that until the heat of the moment.

Overall though, I can't complain when I've got the amount of writing done that I have so far this week. It helps that this is the first of a fanfiction series that has been developing in my head for years and years now. At least five years I think. It's feeling good to finally have it actually down. It's making me feel pretty good.

Reign Review: Season 2 Episode 16: "Tasting Revenge"

Where do I even begin with this episode? First of all, that three week break felt like it was much longer. I'd forgotten what was even going on in the show, but it all came back to me easily enough as I watched.

It feels like a lot happened in this episode, and so much of it involved infidelity. Do we even have one married couple on this show who is currently happy? None are coming to mind. In fact, I think Greer and Lord Castleroy's marriage would win right now just because they're completely separated from each other, and obviously, that doesn't mean much.

This isn't something that really occurred to me after the last episode, but after watching this one, I'm starting to believe that Mary's feelings for Conde are more about her clinging to him as a way to heal as opposed to actually having feelings for him. Now that I'm starting to see it in that way, the story makes more sense to me. I complained last time that, as far as I had been able to tell, Mary's feelings for Conde came out of nowhere, and I think that could be a plausible explanation. It actually makes me feel better about the storyline.

Don't get me wrong, I do think Mary truly cares about Conde. It's just that I think it's always been as a friend. I think she's convinced herself that she has romantic feelings for him for a variety of reasons. Most notably that she's started viewing him as the only chance she has to ever move past what happened to her.

Lola spoke to Francis about how Mary would come back to him in the end. I definitely think she will. The show has built up their relationship as the primary relationship of the show (and romantically speaking, just not through marriage), and while they may do a ton of different storylines to try and shake things up, I don't foresee them doing anything that permanently keeps Mary and Francis apart. They'll always be happy at the very least in spurts. I can't see them doing anything else.

I also said after the last episode that I didn't see Mary going to Scotland for very long if at all, and I think after this episode it's very obvious that she won't be going at all. There's no way she and Conde are making it to Scotland.

Also, as much as I hate Conde, I get why he would pursue Elizabeth. I do, however, wish he would have just broken things off with Mary because he's essentially leading her on. It just be so much better for everyone in the long run if he told her he couldn't be with her. He wouldn't even have to explain why.

Watching Kenna fall for Antoine was so difficult because it's so obvious from the audience's view point that he's lying. It was one of those moments where you really want to reach in the screen and yell at the character to do something (or not do something). I'm hoping Antoine's gone for at least a while now though. I really can't stand him at all, and I'm not sure what his character would have to do anymore.

The last scene with Kenna and Bash was also really sad. They've quickly become two of my favorites. (I don't really have a rank of couples, but they'd probably be second after Greer and Leith if I did.) I hope they work things out.

Speaking of Greer and Leith though, were they not absolutely amazing in this episode? I love them. I loved each scene with the two of them. There is, of course, the problem of Greer being married, but at this point I consider it extremely doubtful that Lord Castleroy is showing up again. I don't know what that means or how it will be handled, but I wouldn't be surprised if Greer ends up no longer married in the future.

Those two were definitely my favorite part of the episode. So much of this episode was the Conde-Mary-Francis triangle, and I've talked before how I'm not very fond of it. I still enjoyed this episode, but I would have liked it more with less of all of that.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Life Post: Getting My First Teeth Fillings

I'm about halfway through spring break, and so far the most note-worthy thing I've done so far is get three cavities filled.

It had been years since I was last on laughing gas (to get teeth pulled when my baby teeth refused to fall out), and that had been a terrible experience. I wasn't necessarily going to get it this time, but because I tend to freak out about things (ask the guy who removed my wisdom teeth), I ended up on laughing gas again for the fillings.

I remember basically nothing from the second they switched over to laughing gas from oxygen for what was apparently the next five minutes, although it felt like an hour or more to me. I suddenly couldn't remember where I was or what was going on, and then it felt like I was waking up from a dream, and I couldn't remember what was real and what wasn't. That was all before they'd even started working on my teeth. My brain wasn't all that crazy while they were doing that. I was pretty aware during it, although the sort of calmness stayed for quite a while.

I know most people enjoy laughing gas or at least don't mind it. To me it's the absolute worst. I hate that feeling that I had in the first five minutes. It's terrible. I don't like not being able to make my brain work the way it should.

The fillings were eventually done though, and then my mom and I went to my grandma's for a while (and I stayed there while my mom went shopping). It was really nice to see her, even if my mouth was pretty numb and not working properly basically the entire time.

The right side of my mouth is still sore, and I can't chew all that well on that side. Soft foods aren't that bad, but I haven't risked anything all that hard.

I'm also not used to the feel of fillings on my teeth, since these are my first, and it's driving me crazy. I know I'll adjust to it, but as of right now, it's hard to believe. I'm just glad it's over, and fingers crossed that I never have to do that again.


I really, really wanted to blog today, but I can't come up with anything all that great to write about. I got my cavities filled yesterday, and my mouth's still sore. (But I'll talk more about that and how I do not like laughing gas in a later life post.) Plus, I've been going to town on this fanfiction for the entirety of break, and my brain's just fried whenever I'm finished with it for the day.

So, instead, I'm just randomly sharing this. Because why not.

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Supernatural Review: First Half of Season Five

I reviewed all of season four of Supernatural over on Youtube (first half and second half), but it's been almost two months since the last one. I haven't had all that much time to watch it lately, and then, once I had watched the entire first half of season five, I was so focused on other things that I forgot I even needed to do a review. This should have been up more than two weeks ago. (Hopefully that just means the review of the rest of season five will be seemingly quicker.)

Anyway, I'm getting so close to when I've had so many people tell me that the show gets bad, so I'm getting more and more nervous about that. I think season six is when most people really think it goes downhill? So I still have a bit, but I'm not gonna lie, I keep thinking about that as I'm watching. It's kind of making me want to take the show slowly because I don't want to start disliking it.

Writing this review is also proving difficult because watching these episodes did take me such a long time that it's a struggle to remember everything. I'm even considering cutting these reviews into smaller amount of episodes. Maybe five or something like my Naruto reviews are. I'm not really sure, but that tends to work pretty well for Naruto. So, what can I think to say about these episodes...

I love Cas. He's so great, and I love the humor he brings. I get really excited every single time he appears.

There was a quote in the first episode of the season that was something along the lines of "dreaming doesn't mean this isn't real." I, of course, immediately thought of Dumbledore and Deathly Hallows.

The storyline of searching for God is such an intriguing one to me. I think that's a very interesting direction to go in, and I'm the idea of the sort of bureaucratic system the angels have going to the point that most of them don't even realize that God is gone is so fascinating to me.

"Jerusalem." "How was it?" "Arid." I have no idea why, but that exchange killed me. For some reason that is just the perfect type of humor to me.

There was an episode that took place in the future, and that future was August 1st, 2014. That was a nice reminder that these episodes are old. (Also, that was three days before my twenty-first birthday. Awesome.)

The haunted wax museum might have scared me away from wax museums in the future, and I was definitely not expecting Paris Hilton in that episode. I was just watching it, and when she popped up, I had to pause it and Google it because I knew it was her but I was having trouble believing it was actually her.

The half-demon/anti-Christ child episode was so sad. I loved the conflict between killing the kid or letting him live because he hadn't actually done anything wrong.

The episode where they get trapped in different types of shows was a fun one. I really liked that episode. The trickster actually being Gabriel was a cool plot twist too.

The Supernatural convention episode was another very fun one to me. I loved that. It was fun to see Sam and Dean react to all of that.

Jo and Ellen's deaths were extremely sad. I'm glad I knew that was coming from spoilers because otherwise they might have been even more sad.

I think that's all I have to say about this set of episodes. I'm already a bit into the second half of the season, so hopefully I'll have a review up for those episodes much sooner than I had this one up.

Life Post: "Spring" Break is Here

It's officially spring break even though for the entire drive home from school I don't think we saw anything but snow. It's at least melting for the most part today, so I guess that makes it more spring-like. I only wore a hoodie earlier today, and I hadn't been able to do that up in Indianapolis since before Christmas break. That's always good. I'm hoping that when I go back up to Indianapolis after break, it'll be warmer there too, but we'll see.

My allergies were not happy about being here. They were so terrible yesterday that it was hard for me to do anything because my head hurt and just wouldn't go away no matter what I did. I was worried that would carry over into today as well, but I actually feel much better. They're more like how they usually are. And the time change doesn't seem to be bothering me either since I switched time zones for break, and the time change just put me back on the time I was on.

I'm hoping that I'll be able to finish up the first draft of the fanfiction I've been working on while I'm home for break. I'm also three books behind on my Goodreads reading challenge (unless I've gotten more behind since I last checked but I won't check again to find out), so I'm really hoping I'll get some reading done too. I did read last night which is the first time I've managed that in ages. I take it as a good sign. Hopefully I get even more reading in though.

Friday, March 6, 2015

College Food Sucks

The fact that college students typically gain weight when they start college is a pretty ubiquitous one. It's more or less expected for a lot of people. I didn't actually experience that. In fact, I lost weight back during my freshmen year because I was eating less. It wasn't me trying to diet or anything either. I ate less because I was on a meal plan, and I'll be honest, my school's dining hall food is terrible. I couldn't stomach it. A lot of it was nearly inedible. They have this terrible habit of taking extremely bland food and just making it spicy in order to mask the lack of favor. They do it with every thing. The problem is, I can't stand spicy.

Now, I was a picky eater as a kid, but these days, I'll eat just about anything. I won't necessarily enjoy it, but I'll eat it without complaint if I have to. And I do that with the dining hall still to this day. It's just that I can only stomach small amounts of it because anymore than that, and I think I'm going to vomit.

Because of that I've lived primarily on microwaveable food ever since I started college, and while that might seem like it would lead to weight gain, I got so tired of eating the same thing over and over that I ate less and therefore lost weight. I'm not saying that's a good thing (Although I want to make it clear that I wasn't starving myself by any means. I was never in a constant state of hunger or anything. It was basically just forcing myself to eat just enough to be full, which is good, but it was terrible food.), but it's what happened a couple of years ago.

And I hated it. I wanted actual food that tasted good but that I never got. The closest thing I got was Subway, which was the only restaurant on campus. We have three more restaurants now, and I eat pizza way too much now thanks to that. Technically, I now have a kitchen that's for the whole floor, but I've seen enough people set off the fire alarm just due to the cooking that I'm too paranoid to go near it. (Seriously, the fire alarms are so sensitive, which is great for fires but not for making me confident in that kitchen.)

So, my diet's pretty terrible. I still haven't gained on weight due to my eating habits because I try to eat at least not insanely terribly. I used to hate salad, but now I love it, so I try to get them when I can. And I do other little things when I can.

Still, I want to work at making my diet better. It may be a struggle when I really only have a microwave to work with, but I'm hoping to have a car soon, which could mean actually going and buying groceries regularly (which means more produce and other things with shorter expiration dates). Hopefully that'll get me started towards eating healthier because I know I would feel a lot better if I did. I'm so tired of the diet I've had for most of the last two and a half years. It's terrible. I don't recommend it at all.

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Life Post: Are We Sure It's Spring Break?

Tomorrow is the last day of classes, and then I'm on spring break. Not only is there still snow on the ground, but one time when I went outside today there were flurries. Yet tomorrow is spring break. It's crazy. It doesn't feel like spring break at all.

Actually, that's not completely true. It does feel like we've reached the point in the semester where we should be getting a break. Trust me. It doesn't feel like spring break though because it's definitely still winter. I keep hoping that it will warm up, but it hasn't happened yet.

I could lucky this week and only had two tests, which weren't even special midterms, just normal tests. That was nice. I have two papers to work on over spring break as well as other homework, but I'm still hoping it'll feel like a break.

I'm actually already starting to feel like I'm on a break because I spent a lot of my day watching Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire instead of writing. I have finished the work I had left to do before the week is over, but I still have a lot of writing left in order to hit my word count today. And the movie's not even over. I always forget how long the Harry Potter movies are until stuff like this happens. Since spring break starts tomorrow though, I'm not really worried about whether or not I hit my word count today. I'll roll it over tomorrow, and even if I have to do that again on Saturday, I should catch up easily considering it's break.

That being said, I'm going to go get some more writing done before I try and finish up the movie.

Since my last post, I wrote a post on my writing blog about how awesome the universe is. On Youtube I posted my February wrap-up and March TBR and a vlog.

Monday, March 2, 2015

Life Post: Oh, Look, Something Actually Happened

For the first time in what seems like quite a while, I actually have something exciting to share in a life post, and it's only been a few days since my last one!

So, I have a practicum at a middle school this semester, and I got to go meet with the teacher for the first time. They had a two hour delay, but I was there at eight and stayed for two hours. All of the kids were coming in when I left, so I didn't meet any kids or anything. I did have a meeting with the teacher I'll be working with and got a tour of the school and things like that. We set a schedule for me going in the rest of the semester, and I got to meet a lot of the staff around the school. I'm pretty optimistic about it. It'll be my first time actually in the classroom (unless you count peer tutoring middle schoolers when I was in high school), so it should be interesting at least.

Obviously I won't be able to talk about that all that much here because of students' privacy, but I wanted to mention that I'd gone since it feels like it's kind of a big deal. And also the most note-worthy thing from me recently since I've been consumed with school and books. (I've begun using that exact phrase all of the time now because apparently I like the imagery "consumed" creates. I don't know why.)

We also had a record snowfall for March 1st, so that was great when I had to drive to the school. What should have been a ten minute drive took me forty, but that's also because I got lost. (And by lost, I mean that I was going the right way but second guessed myself and then managed to basically get lost by thinking I was already lost. And then I did the same thing on the way back to campus. Note to self: trust your gut instinct when you're going places. It's more likely to be right.) Luckily, I had decided to leave forty minutes early, so I got there exactly three minutes early. (Probably exactly on time by the time I made it to the office.) I was getting really worried there towards the end of the drive.

Anyway, I was originally bringing up the snow in order to talk about how spring break is next week, yet we have piles of snow everywhere and are supposed to get freezing rain tomorrow morning. Amazingly, even with all of this weather, I haven't even had canceled classes. (I mean, I even spent time in a middle school while it was on a two hour delay today. Nothing's really stopped for me because of the weather.) I'm wondering if my first class will be canceled tomorrow though because of the ice. I don't think we've had all that much ice so far, so this'll be worse than the snow. It's supposed to shoot up to forty later though (and then drop down again. Our weather likes its temper tantrums.), so I don't imagine I'll miss more than my first class. We'll see.

This is the longest life post I've written in ages. It's amazing what one change in your routine will bring out. I seriously have been able to think about nothing but school and writing lately. Which, speaking of, I have both more homework and more writing to get to today, so I'm off to go do that.

Oh, but I do have to mention that I wrote about my ongoing writer's block of sorts on my writing blog yesterday. The truly funny thing is this post seems to contradict everything I said in that post, so I'm hoping that means writing about it broke all of that. Here's hoping.

Soundtrack of My Life

I decided to do something kind of fun. In this post, I'm going to choose five songs that would be on the soundtrack to my life if I had one, and I'll explain why. It would be even funner if I could add more, so I may do that in the future too. We'll see.

1. New At This by Megan & Liz. Yes, technically this song is about turning twenty-one, but I think it describes how I feel about growing up in every way right now. If my life had a soundtrack, this one would definitely be on there for the current point in my life I think.

2. Don't Forget Where You Belong by One Direction. I think this would be a good song for that period when you first come to college. That's what it makes me think of.

3. Salute by Little Mix. For all the times I get angry over how sexist the world is, which is at least once daily. Seriously. This song has to be on there.

4. A Different Beat by Little Mix. Of course I have more than one Little Mix song here. I actually wanted to add a ton, but I decided on these two. I think this song would work for the vast majority of my life to be honest.

5. Human by Cher Lloyd. This is the closest thing to a sad song that I'm adding on here. I've also talked about how much I love this song in the past. I think it works really well for sadder points in my life while also having a more positive tone in my opinion.

The more I do music-related posts the more and more obvious my very clear biases are when it comes to music. In all fairness, there are plenty of other songs I would have added by different people if I'd had time to do an insanely long one of these, but when I have to narrow it down, of course I go with my favorites first.

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Book Review: Groovy Cool Writing Techniques by Cinta Garcia de la Rosa

Published: March 1st, 2015
Publisher: self-published
Read from February 13th to 21st, 2015
Synopsis from Goodreads:
Groovy Cool Writing Techniques is a collection of essays developing techniques for improving writing in a creative way. Every person is creative; they only need to light that spark inside, so the magic can begin. A picture, a walk in the streets, your own childhood memories... Everything can hold stories. You just need to find the way to tell those stories in a creative way. This book can help you.


This book is basically a collection of different "exercises" that you can do whenever you're feeling stuck with your writing. It's a really quick read. Each chapter (or essay) is short and to the point, and at the end of each is at least one technique that the author has suggested.

The book is easy to read, and it has some good advice. I think I would primarily recommend the book to those who are newer to writing as I imagine most seasoned writers will already have heard much of what is said in the book. Still, I think it's a great resource for newer writers, and it is a fun and quick resource.

I received this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.